LOS ANGELES — An extremely weird episode of cult classic television show Twin Peaks features two terrifying black bars on either side of the screen, according to 30-year-old binge-watcher Sydney Aguirre.
“I finally got around to watching Twin Peaks after all these years and holy shit, everyone was right: this is the weirdest show of all time,” Aguirre explained. “I’ve never seen anything like it, but the episodes are nearly square-shaped and have these scary black lines on the left and right side of the screen. It’s extremely Lynchian. There’s simply no other word to describe it.”
According to film historian Reginald Spence, many television fans find the iconic black lines of the Twin Peaks pilot confusing.
“Twin Peaks is the television show that invented being weird, so it makes sense that the black lines on the side of the screen are disorienting to viewers,” Spence said. “But this is all in-line with the common themes of Lynch’s work. Despite the quaint silliness of the drama in the town of Twin Peaks, there is this ever-constant darkness resting just off-screen, on the edges of the frame. These towering black lines represent the evil underbelly of humanity. They’re always there, watching and waiting for us to slip up.”
Despite the popularity of the iconic lines, rumors are circulating that Netflix is looking to purchase the streaming rights to the series, zooming in on episodes to make them full-screen on televisions and phones.
“The show is too weird. What’s with those black lines? Get rid of them,” said Netflix CEO Ted Sarandos. “We’re also gonna get rid of any scene where somebody dances. Our metrics show that anytime people are dancing, we lose 3% of viewers to Instagram reels. So those have to go.”
But Twin Peaks isn’t the only weird 90s media people are watching. Many viewers have also stumbled upon the nearly-lost 1993 film Schindler’s List, which is reportedly so strange, that it is devoid of all color.
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