Jeremy Kaplowitz
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The Oscars Have Fixed Their Mistake: Ryan Gosling Is Now Nominated for “Best Actress”
Well, the fans have spoken, and the Oscars have heard! The Academy has officially apologized for…
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Netflix Announces Live Action “Neon Genesis Evangelion” Adaptation, Bringing About Third Impact
NEW LOS ANGELES-3 CITY — The souls of all humans on Earth were absorbed by Lilith’s…
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“How to Blow Up a Pipeline” Creators Suddenly Feeling Inspired After Oscars Snub
LOS ANGELES — The creative team behind the 2023 film “How to Blow Up a Pipeline”…
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Paul Schrader Gets Himself Arrested So He Can Live Out “Pickpocket” Ending for Real
NEW YORK — Director and writer Paul Schrader was arrested today after mugging several people in…
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Netflix Announces Stand-Up Special From Lydia Tár
LOS ANGELES — Netflix announced today that disgraced conductor Lydia Tár will be recording her first…
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Star Wars Producer Scrolls Through Kurosawa’s IMDb for Next Idea
LOS ANGELES — Disney producer Grover Best reportedly scrolled through Akira Kurosawa’s IMDb page today, looking…
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Leonardo DiCaprio Devastated After Girlfriend Rents Car Without Extra Fee
LOS ANGELES — Actor Leonardo DiCaprio was reportedly distraught after discovering that his girlfriend Vittoria Ceretti…
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“Plagiarism and You(Tube)” Inexplicably Wins Best TV Documentary at the Emmys
LOS ANGELES — Despite not being nominated and not being on television, Harry “Hbomberguy” Brewis’ Plagiarism…
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Is Everything After Mahito Hits His Head Just a Dream? 5 “The Boy and the Heron” Fan Theories Developed by Scientists to Make You Insane
Hayao Miyazaki’s swan song The Boy and the Heron is a beautiful work of art that…
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Dave Chappelle Hospitalized After Hitting Knee Too Hard in Joke About His Pronouns Being “Fuck/You”
LOS ANGELES — Comedian Dave Chappelle is in critical condition at a local hospital after hitting…