HOLLYWOOD — According to many fans closely following The Oscars, Bradley Cooper is too transparent about wanting to win an award which would afford him permanent acclaim in his chosen profession.
“It’s like, give it a rest already,” said Pat Greer, a teacher from Wilkesboro, N.C. “Does ‘it’s an honor just to be nominated’ mean nothing to you? If he loses, and I see even an iota of disappointment on his face, I’m just done with him.”
The award, presented by The Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences, would serve as a fixture before his name for the rest of life. Indeed, as a nominee, this is also the case, except that it would instead be the very lack of victory etched into the eternal plaque preceding his name. This night frozen in time, ad infinitum. Always a nominee — never a winner.
“It’s not such a big deal,” said Greer, with crossed arms. “You’re an actor? Act like you don’t want the award, then! How about that! It’s only supposed to transmute into an incredible honor at the exact moment you step on to the stage.”
Despite criticism, the pathetically desperate Cooper futilely attempted to remain positive.
“I just think it would be neat,” Cooper said. “Because of all the work I did.”
At press time, Cooper was seen gathering his thoughts. So annoying.
Photo courtesy of A.M.P.A.S®. OSCARS® Logo ©Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences®.
